Just Be Sick
I was scrolling through insta the other day and was bombarded with encouraging messages. Which, I’m sure for normal people, is an awesome thing. I’m sure it gets them pumped up and stoked to tackle the day. I assume they become super charged with each sparkly graphic encouraging them to change the world. I’m sure that feels great for them.
But for someone who struggles getting out of bed, DAMMIT IT’S FRUSTRATING!
Everyone is telling me to get up and grind and I’m over here like NO GETTING OUT OF BED IS MORE THAN ENOUGH. There isn’t enough encouragement out there to just stay in bed. To be sad, to be sick, to be wherever you are.
For example, my sister (one of the six) has been the walking dead for years. She sleeps ALL THE TIME. And can always sleep more. We call her the house cat.
She’s been fighting her natural desire to lay in bed for a long time; she makes healthy choices, exercises, eats well, goes to work, but ultimately finds herself passed out, worn out, and emotionally drained just about every week.
Convinced she was just “lazy,” she kept pushing, pushing, pushing, until this week. She visited an Ear Nose and Throat doctor to talk about her problems breathing while sleeping. After a CT scan it was revealed she has chronic sinus disease. Basically she’s been living with a severe sinus infection for years. Fatigue, headaches, lack of taste and smell, difficulty breathing, she’s been pushing through really painful symptoms because she didn’t believe she was sick enough. Because it wasn’t terrible, she kept going.
So today, I’m here to be the anti-advice giver. Just. Be. Sick. If you’re hurting, emotionally, mentally, physically, don’t just accept it as reality. Don’t be tough, or motivated, or “in control.”
Just be sick dammit. You can’t got the doctor until you admit your sick. You can’t go to a counselor until you admit you don’t have it under control. You can’t go to a surgeon until you admit you might die.
Making yourself better, “toughing it out,” consoling yourself through exercise only works if your baseline is healthy. Your brain, body, and soul must be aligned, healthy, and ready to receive such encouragement. Until then, it’s a great way to encourage yourself to power through chronic pain, sadness, anxiety, depression, and addiction to even more chronic pain, sadness, anxiety, depression, and addiction.
SO. Here are some un-motivating quotes, direct from me to you.
Have a great weekend being alive. I’m proud of you for doing that.