I’m sure you’ve noticed the drop off in posts coming from this side of town. Or maybe you haven’t and I just think I’m more important than I really am.
I’ve been busy trying new things that scare me. I’ve been putting myself out there and I’ve felt the sharp sting of failure. I’ve tasted the bitterness of doubt. Overall, I’ve just had a lot of sensations, most of them not so great.
I’ve spent days wondering what on earth I’m supposed to be doing. I’ve considered writing a blog post called “Tell me what to do with my life (also give me compliments)” but decided against it. Seemed a little needy.
I’ve been feverishly playing Real or Not Real. Thankfully, husband is better than me at it.
I might as well be screaming “SOMEONE TELL ME I’M PRETTY AND TALENTED.” Because that’s how I’ve felt lately.
My general mood has been as follows:
“Sarah, I love your face your pretty kitten face!”
“Wanna cuddle and watch Christmas movies?”
*general confusion I feel when sitting down to do work.*
Or when someone asks me if I want to go out and see people and do things.
Well that got out of hand quickly.
Overall, I’m just a little insecure right now. But it’s because I’m trying new things, so like, points for that, right? But it means I don’t feel like I have much to share, other than typing the word failure over and over again.
I hope 30 year old Sarah is proud and smiling back at me right now, because I want to punch her in the damn face for taking so long to get her life together.